There’s a shop in the town Kozhencherry which has the hoarding: ‘SEND MONEY ABROAD.’ For a long time, may be about a year, I have been wanting to send money to a dear friend of mine in the Philippines. I don’t have any salary and all I have is an allowance for the day to buy Coffee and Cigarettes. I am like a slave in my own house. Right now I have been called for an interview in the Philippines and I have come to like the management of the school. For extra money, I resort to buying lottery tickets. I used to peruse astrology columns. Some days the stars proclaim: ‘lady luck is going to smile for you’; ‘you are going to get money from unexpected sources’; ‘today you can expect a windfall’; I wait with eager anticipation and check the internet for lottery results. But fate is a machete that slices my luck. Yes, I need a better paying job, a decent place to stay and lots of time for writing. My material needs are spiritual for me and they are my prayers, they are my GOD. Even today I have found some money lying on the road and I have had coffee and purchased lottery tickets till Tuesday. May be some day, the law of averages might cast a fairy Godmother for me. I have no regrets, and I hopefully optimistic. My archetypal fairy is a bitch of hope.